Vibrators: A Bad Topic for First Dates

I work at a big box retailer and when things are slow a few of us "associates" hang out in the back room and shoot the breeze. Of course they know I'm single and they are always trying to set me up with a friend or something. One of the women especially had really been on me about meeting her friend and after a few weeks of badgering me I agreed to a blind date with this woman.

Mr. Jackhammer

After a few texts back and forth I met Connie at a bar near my work for drinks. At first I was pleasantly surprised because she seemed great. She was really cute, quirky and spunky. The conversation flowed easily and I was thinking that this one might just work out.

Then, some how she brought up the topic of masturbation. I'm enough of a gentleman that I know that's not a first date topic so I just tried to guide the topic to something less sexual but she was suddenly on the subject like a dog on a bone.

Within a few minutes I learned all about how she masturbates three to five times a day. She likes to do it in the car and often has an orgasm or two at work. She told me how she has a huge selection of dildos, vibrators and lubes that she pleasures herself with. She also told me that she keeps her stash in a cabinet in her bedroom with a little lock on it to keep her kids out.

She explained how her preferred way to masturbate is with a little pink vibrator and that sometimes she just keeps it in her panties all day. Apparently it was a bullet vibrator and she named it "Mister Jackhammer". She boasted about how it is wireless so she can turn it on with a Bluetooth phone app. She even has it connected to her smart home device - "Alexa: Give me an O".

By then I was pretty uncomfortable. I'm not a prude and, of course, I masturbate and It's not taboo. It's just not something I discuss with people - especially not with strangers. But Connie kept on about how good it feels and I was just on the fence about making an excuse to leave when it happened... She reached under her skirt and pulled her vibrator out to show me. I was floored. In the time it took her to get her iPhone app opened and the vibrator on full power, I pretended to get an emergency text.

I left twenty bucks for the drinks on the bar right next to her vibrator buzzing beside it.

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